Fuck Yeah, Dwarf Fortress!

Since condorboh didn’t gt the reference I thought I would help him/her out a little

A typical example (from the wiki)

  1. While you’re not watching (of course), a furnace operator gets hit by fireball from a fire imp while working at the magma smelter.
  2. The furnace operator then runs around on his business, smelting coke, and sets fire to both the charcoal stockpile, and a bituminous coal vein.
  3. As he does this he takes burning damage.
  4. Now wounded, he heads for the barracks for a rest.
  5. The dwarf dies on the way, and his (still burning) clothes fall to the side.
    (Somehow, let’s say you miss the announcement of his death - the game doesn’t pause or re-center, so it wouldn’t be the first time.)
  6. A peasant comes and picks up his pig tail shoe and puts it on. His clothing catches on fire.
  7. He goes to the surface and starts a forest fire, which distracts you for some time. You think the forest fire caught him on fire, not the other way around.
  8. Meanwhile, your legendary armorer grabs some charcoal for a new steel project. Soon, he’s a legendary armorer (but not for long…)
  9. hauler grabs some armor in the forge where the charcoal is burning, catches fire, and sets fire to the leather armor items in the armor stockpile, and/or the rows of wooden bins there.
  10. A miner finds the burning coal vein, and becomes a miner.
  11. One of these dwarves soon feels hurt also, and heads for the barracks to rest, getting on a wooden bed and lighting that up.
  12. Another goes and has a drink, setting fire to the booze stockpiles and causing all of the drinks to boil away.
  13. Nearby beds and food stockpiles light up; dwarves sleep on those beds and the others near it and get lit up themselves, as well as the dwarves going for a drink or meal, and for the pig tail robe.
  14. The announcements about all the dwarves that have “died in the heat” start pouring in - you don’t miss these.
  15. You find the burning coal vein and miner, and blame it on him, wondering when and why he went outside into the forest fire.
  16. Now a fair portion of the fortress is on fire, but you can’t do anything about it, and can’t see what’s happening very well for all the smoke.
  17. To save what dwarves you can, you <A>ctivate them, and so some and go to the burning armor bins to get armored up.
  18. Those few who do manage to get out unlit have all lost several friends and loved ones, and a tantrum spiral is now unavoidable. Those few soon go insane and throw themselves into the river in a final ironic act.

So there you have it, how FUN can turn into !!FUN!!

Great gif courtesy of DF wiki user Boo Radley (whoever that may be, no other details given) which isn’t entirely accurate, in that Dwarves never seem to notice when they become !!Dwarves!!

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  6. ashadowofthenight reblogged this from tumblrisweird and added:
    😆This game is kind of stupid 😆
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    This is why you learn how to create a clothing industry, so they aren’t so desperate to cover up that they would rather...
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    Since condorboh didn’t gt the reference I thought I would help him/her out a little So there you have it, how FUN can...
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